that rosebud girl

Fighting the good fight

Normally, the news that one of my nearest and dearest friends from college is getting engaged is wonderful news, but this piece of news was so poignant and bittersweet.

Mark is my best friend from college. He’s one of the kindest, gentlest souls I have ever known. He never spoke ill of peope, didn’t swear or drink, was deeply spiritual and God-fearing (pretty much all the things I wasn’t). He wasn’t in-your-face about anything and the perfect foil to my um, not so even-tempered demeanor.

Just before I left college, Mark told me he was gay. He struggled a bit with this, trying to reconcile that with his faith. But he eventually learned to deal with it on his own terms and embrace who he was.

And recently came the news he wanted to propose to his partner of two and a half years, knowing full well they wouldn’t be able to marry here in California. He wanted to do it anyway, to express the fact he wanted to spend he rest of his life with this man. Mark wrote this eloquent email to his friends telling us all this, and it was very moving to see him wanting to move forward in the face of what he knew to be the facts.

I commend Mark for his courage. And his unwavering optimism. Because that’s who he is. I don’t think he’s capable of cynicism. And the rebel in me has to smile because he’s sticking it to the man in his own way.

He’s fighting the good fight, and I will fight it along with him. And I’ll do it his way, without bombast and harsh words and actions. Because his gentle way, I think, speaks more volumes than shouting and placards do.

I wish him the best of luck.

June 20, 2009 on 11:31 am | Comments Off